Are You Pushing or Pulling?

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"Pushing implies that we’re starting from the place of nothing—not good enough—and trying to get somewhere. Pulling implies that some future vision of us is already alive and present, and is bringing us forward."

For accessibility and ease, you can listen to this blog post narrated by Mike:


I’ve pushed myself my whole life.

Pushed myself to do more. Pushed myself to be productive. Pushed myself to write for certain publications or finish certain projects or get more people into my programs.

I pushed myself so hard that I woke up one day vomiting blood. And it didn’t stop for two months.

Because I was pushing myself to be good enough. To achieve my purpose. To hustle and grind and strive.

Maybe if I earned X amount of money or built a business sky-high or received some public accolades, then I could feel worthy and good enough.

And let me tell you firsthand—pushing is exhausting. We visionaries know a thing or two about pushing. About taking every course. Learning the rules. Working ourselves to the bone.

Because we’re the “not enough” and “too much” people. We never quite fit in to other people’s boxes. So we’ve internalized that shame and tell ourselves that maybe, just maybe, if we push a little harder, we could be good enough.

Everything feels like effort. Everything feels heavy. Everything is just plain tiring.

But the thing about us visionaries is we’re not the pushers of the world; we’re the pullers.

We are pulled by our vision. And, through it, we pull the world forward into new possibilities.

For so long, I thought I had to push. Push to get people in my programs. Push to get my work out to the world. Push to generally do more.

I felt exhausted and—quite frankly—triggered by anyone suggesting I do more or change anything. Because it was all pushing.

Pushing implies that we’re starting from the place of nothing—not good enough—and trying to get somewhere. Pulling implies that some future vision of us is already alive and present, and is bringing us forward.

It’s subtle. But it’s a big difference.

Pulling isn’t saying we’re not good enough. It’s saying there are deeper levels of embodiment of who we are. And all we have to do is follow our visions to step into them.

Because our visions are the most sensitive, tender parts of ourselves. They’re our highest potential. And they pull us forward.

Pushing is willpower. Pulling is purpose.

It’s remembering why we’re doing this. Why it matters. And letting that pull us forward.

Every morning, when I exercise and want to give up, I don’t push myself to do more. I don’t tell myself I’m not good enough and need to get better.

Instead, I connect with why I even have the crazy idea to exercise in the first place. And, without fail, it pulls me forward to a deeper embodiment.

We visionaries see possibilities for the world that don’t quite exist yet. Our only way to ever reach them is to be pulled by them.

I know that, in my work, people are pulled in. And they don’t always know why. Maybe it’s something I say or write. But, more likely, people just say, “I can’t remember why, but it felt like the right time.”

And sometimes that freaks me out, right? Because I want to push and strive and do more webinars to get people in. But, when I just follow the vision, they find their way naturally. They’re pulled in.

All I have to do is connect with my genius. Be myself. And the work can pull others forward just as much as it pulls me forward.

Willpower alone has been largely disproven in studies again and again. Humans rarely act out of what they want to do and act much more out of why they’re doing it—the values and identity behind the desire. The purpose.

If we try to force ourselves to do something we’re not aligned with, we’re going to have a pretty hard time doing it.

Pushing doesn’t really work. And it just reiterates the story that we’re not enough.

But, if we do it because it feels so good. Because it’s part of our vision. Because it’s who we are and who we’re becoming. And because we’re being pulled forward to step deeper into it—if we do it for those reasons, it’s a hell of a lot easier to stick.

We make it so complicated. I know I certainly have. Always doubting myself. And changing directions every so often. And jumping after new shiny objects. And feeling like “this is it—I’ve finally figured it out, only to jump ship a few weeks later”

And all the while the vision has always been there. Slow, gentle, guiding. Maybe not clear or complete. But just enough to know what feels natural and right, and what doesn’t.

And that subtle guidance is all we need. We might jump off course. We might make mistakes. We might try things that never work.

But our visions are always pulling us back on course, if we just listen. They’re always reminding us of who we are and our genius. And helping us to step deeper into that embodiment.

Visions have a gravitational pull. They pull us forward. And, the more we embody them, they pull others forward, too.

I often say, “You have never to try to be yourself. If you’re trying, it means you’re being someone else.”

You can be led. You can be guided. You can be pulled forward.

All of that heaviness and exhaustion and hustling of pushing is a sign that it’s big-time trying.

But, being led, even when it feels uncomfortable or like sacrifice, that’s not trying. Not really. It’s not efforting outside of yourself. It’s efforting in natural alignment with yourself.

Like cooking a delicious meal. Or playing with your kids. Or doing a hobby that you love. Sure, there are parts that take effort. But it’s effort that’s aligned with you. It’s the only thing you want to be doing right then.

The aroma of your sauce pulls you forward. The smile on your kid’s face pulls you forward. The potential of a completed project pulls you forward.

It’s alive. It’s real. And it’s pulling you forward into becoming more of yourself.

That’s what visions are. That’s what visions do.

They make you more of yourself.

You are a genius. You are a visionary. And, if you stop pushing and let your visions pull you forward, you’ll step deeper and deeper into that.


Questions for Reflection:

*Answer in a journal, in the comments right here, or take it over to the Sacred Branding® Facebook group where we can support one another.

Are you pushing or pulling?

— Do you often push yourself or push for the things you want in the world? Do you sometimes feel like you’re not good enough or you’re asking yourself to do more, to be more productive?

— Do you ever feel like if you just reach a certain income or number of clients or relationship status that you’ll finally be okay and good enough? Do you push yourself to get to that point?

— What if you never need to push? What if all you need to do is connect with your genius and your vision and let them pull you forward? What if you are a visionary—you’re pulling the world towards new possibilities, starting with yourself? And all you have to do is connect with what’s possible and why you’re doing it?

Mike Iamele

Mike Iamele

Mike writes about how artists, entrepreneurs, healers, and visionaries of all kinds can actually build a life around the genius inside of them.

He's CEO of Mike Iamele LLC and Creator of Sacred Branding® and the Sacred Circle.

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