For accessibility and ease, you can listen to this post narrated by Mike:
Falling in love is a dangerous thing.
In fact, it might be the most dangerous thing out there. There’s nothing that’s been a bigger threat to my life than falling in love.
When I’m in love, I put myself in situations I never would have otherwise. I’ll do things I’m terrified of, things that are emotionally challenging, things that I’d have to be crazy to put myself through.
Falling in love with Garrett led me to try a new kind of relationship and learn about myself. Falling in love with my work led me to sell my shares and leave a well-paid job with no real plan. Falling in love with my dogs led me to intentionally stay home some nights, and even occasionally (semi) happily clean up vomit and pee.
There’s been no greater threat to my life than falling in love. It’s forced me to make irrational decisions, to act uncharacteristically, and to generally just change my life.
And the thing is—we visionaries are notorious romantics. We can’t help it. We fall in love. And we fall hard. With everything.
Get me started on any subject—Ancient Rome, health inequities, the best restaurants in Boston—and I just can’t stop talking. Even when I know I’m being annoying or belaboring a point. I can’t stop myself. There’s so much to say. There’s so much to learn about.
We sensitives are an ill-fated bunch. Because we’re sensitive to everything. We can sense more in everything. We can see its essence where others cannot.
And, so, we fall in love.
And it makes us do crazy, irrational things. Like believe in people’s potential. Or spend hours reading about a topic. Or try to do something that everyone around us swears is impossible.
The greatest danger of all is when we fall in love with a vision. Because that’s it. The moment that happens, we’re doomed. We’ll sacrifice things like money and security and even good sense just to pursue it.
The vision is so real to us. So alive. And we fall in love.
And we’re so in love that we can’t accept failure. We get up every time we fall down. We try just one more way. We try just one more thing.
We’re all romance and failure. Being pulled, allured, by the vision we’ve fallen head over heels with.
It’s the type of nonsensical thing that led me to think proposing to Garrett on a balcony in the Amalfi Coast was a good idea—even when a million challenges told me it was impossible.
It’s the type of nonsensical thing that led me to keep writing this blog every day for the last five and a half years, even when I wasn’t getting clients from it.
I’m not kidding—falling in love is a dangerous thing.
Because it makes you act outside of your normal ways of being.
I’d never do this work if I weren’t in love. No sir. I mean, I’ve run Sacred Circle rounds where only three people joined. And I’ve taught webinars to just one attendee (I kid you not). And I’ve spent my fair share of nights in tears when something didn’t work out.
You’d have to be a sucker to choose that path for yourself. And I am one. I’m a sucker in love.
Life really would be easier without love. I won’t lie—I’m the kind of guy who prizes comfort. Give me a comfortable couch and some Netflix, and I’m golden for a Sunday. I’m really terrible at pushing or forcing myself to do something productive.
So I just wouldn’t. I’d live a nice, easy, comfortable life. If it weren’t for love.
Love gives me these crazy ideas that I’m too in love with the world around me to give up on it. That I have to write every weekday because it’s a small way I can freely help people see that they’re geniuses.
And love makes me think it’s totally reasonable to tell a friend I believe in them, or give a Circler space to have a meltdown in front of everyone, or take time out of my day to clean the entire house—even when I’m crazy busy—just because it’ll make Garrett smile.
It’s not discipline or organization that makes me do all the things I do in life. It’s love—pure, foolish love.
I can’t help but be such a romantic. And believe that all people have a genius inside of them. Believe in a vision where people can be good enough as themselves and passionately express themselves to each other. Believe in a world where we get to do the thing we’re the very best at every day and be compensated fairly for it.
I told you—it’s foolish. To think that art can save the world. And that impossible things can happen. And that I’m just going to get up one more time—even if I’ve failed 10 times before.
It’s foolish. And it’s love.
Love makes you sacrifice. It makes you sacrifice who you once were in pursuit of something bigger—a vision. And you get so caught up in loving that vision that you forget to be insecure or exhausted or afraid. Or maybe you remember, but you do it anyway. Because you’re in love.
Love is life force energy, itself. It’s growth. It’s evolution and change. And that’s what makes it so dangerous. The current world isn’t safe. Because the second we fall in love, we’re having to sacrifice what was to become what will be. We’re changing the world.
In my experience, love is the only thing that really, really makes the world change. Because it’s the only thing that pulls us forward out of comfort and into the unknown.
We’d have to be crazy to willingly choose that path. But love makes us do crazy things.
So I sympathize with you, visionary. I get it. We’re a pathetic bunch here. So deeply in love with our visions and the world around us that we can’t help but want to do something “impossible.”
All romance and failure. Falling down 10 times and still getting back up. Still believing that the world deserves it. And so do we.
The curse and blessing of every visionary is that we’re suckers for love. And love is how we change the world.
Questions for Reflection:
*Answer in a journal, in the comments right here, or take it over to the Sacred Branding® Facebook group where we can support one another:
Are you a sucker for love?
— Do you get excited or passionate about all of the ideas? Forgetting to “keep your voice down” or “not get so emotional”? Could you talk about some of these topics forever?
— Does falling in love lead you to do crazy things? Like take chances you never would have taken otherwise? Or put yourself in situations that may be uncomfortable or emotionally scary? Or get back up even when you’ve failed again and again?
— What if your greatest gift as a visionary is that you fall in love easily? That you’re sensitive—can sense more—and, therefore, fall in love with the essence in everything? What if being all romance and failure is the only way we change the world?