Last night we had our first ever Info Session about the Circle. Sherri and I had never had one before. And, to be totally honest, we had no idea what we were doing with it.
Hours before the call, Sherri e-mailed me and said, “Do we need to connect quickly to just talk about it?” And I thought for a moment and then responded, “Let’s wing it. That’s how we run the Circle anyway.” And we did.
I was amazed at the turnout that we had. All of the eager faces, listening intently to our stories about the Circle. Our laughter. Our honesty. Our vulnerability. It was an open forum with past Circlers and us. Just being ourselves. Helping people to feel the energy of the Circle.
After the call, I paused for a moment and reflected. I remember the days when I felt like I had to prove something. My worth mostly. When I had to create the fancy PowerPoint and be overly prepared. When I felt like I had to sell myself. Not even just in business. But to friends. To colleagues. To people all around me. When I felt like I wasn’t good enough to just show up and wing it.
In that instant, I was taken back to a scene from this past weekend. We were driving up to Vermont for a friend’s bachelor party. And we were taking along a friend who’s a brilliant PhD-educated scientist in a lab at MIT. And he was asking me about my work. Channeling, transmuting trauma, and all. Completely different from the work he does every day. And I noticed that I didn’t hold back. I didn’t have any fear or shame. To be frank, I couldn’t have cared less if he thought I was crazy or not. I was just me.
Because that’s enough. That’s always enough. Hell, that’s everything I ever could be.
Something about last night’s call felt significant. Mostly because it was a reminder to me that I am living my work, my purpose. That I’ve created containers that feel like me. From the way I dress to the way I do my hair to the home I live in to every single interaction I have, it’s already a container for me. It’s set up for me. I just show up and be. Not do. Be. Because the container is designed to house me.
I love getting to get up each day and write to you. Because, in those moments, I get to see me just as much as you do. And, in this crazy, hectic world, sometimes those moments of looking in the mirror—really, really seeing your Soul in the mirror—are rare. And there’s something beautiful about it. Something utterly beautiful about being seen in that way.
I’ve spent a lot of my life hiding. My shame. My embarrassment. My insecurities. Or perceived weaknesses. I didn’t want people to see the “bad stuff.” I only wanted them to see the glossy finish. The filtered photos. The touched up perfection.
For so long, I didn’t realize that all of me was where the power sat. Not in any one aspect that I arbitrarily judged as good or bad. But in the cumulation of all I am and ever could be.
And I love it. I love being me. I love being in my home. I love being in my relationship. I love being in my business. I love this blog. I fucking love the Sacred Circle more than you can know. Mostly because those are all places where I can see my Soul shine.
Good containers allow all of us to come forward. They allow us to see our Soul totally and completely. They allow us to see that we’re perfect and whole and complete. Every aspect of us is ‘good enough.’ Every aspect of us is beautiful. Every aspect of us makes sense.
I love that my life really is that simple. I just get to show up and be all of me. And encourage others to show up and be all of them.
Don’t get me wrong. I’ve been dragged through hell to reclaim all of those parts of myself. The Sacred Circle drags me through hell every single time. It’s painful. It’s emotional. It’s heart-wrenching. And it’s the most freeing process I’ve every experienced.
It will ask everything of you. But it will give you everything you’ve ever wanted. It will give you yourself.
Is there anything more you can ask for?