My Secret to Success Has Nothing to Do With “Working Hard”

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I probably wouldn’t have started a business if it weren’t for Garrett.

And I probably wouldn’t be running nine Circles or facilitating the Sacred Mastermind or even letting the work expand to what it’s becoming if it weren’t for Sherri.

And I probably wouldn’t have begun working with Sherri—or even proposed to Garrett—if it weren’t for my lawyer Lisa Fraley.

And I probably wouldn’t be emotionally composed this tax season—or any tax season—if it weren’t for my accountant Deepa Ramachandran.

And I wouldn’t even be where I am today with my energy healer and friend Deana Welch. Or my life strategist and friend Alexis Pierce. Or the countless mentors, supports, teachers, and family members in my life. There are too many to name. But it’s fascinating to me that I probably wouldn’t even be in business today had so many of these people not been in my life.

I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately. My good friend and lawyer Lisa Fraley interview me for her new podcast on Wednesday. And we talked about the energetics behind the law. And I told her a story about how I proposed to Garrett—and why I wouldn’t have done it without her help.

See, at the time, my business hadn’t been a formal LLC yet. I knew that at any point I could technically be sued, and my assets were at risk. But I wasn’t willing to even take a step toward marriage until Garrett’s assets were protected. So I went to Lisa and told her we needed to stop the process.

Within one month of LLC formation, I bought the tickets to Italy. And I proposed.

It’s made me think about how much support begets support. How momentum builds. And how taking small steps forward in life always leads to becoming more of whom you want to be.

Honestly, I don’t think I ever would have had the courage to leave my job or start a business if it weren’t for Garrett believing in me so fully every single day. Believing that I really will change lives. And that my words and my thoughts need to be shared. It was that kind of belief—that kind of love—that ultimately empowered me to heal my body from that debilitating illness. And then continue healing every aspect of my life. Which led to me making a plan to leave my company just a few months after getting better.

Sherri said something to me the other day that’s made me think. She said, “I’m so grateful you do this work, and I get to be a part of it. Because I don’t think I’d do this myself, but I love that this gets to be what I do.” And I thought about it. Mostly because I feel the same way. I don’t know that I could do this work without her. At least not to this capacity. So I’m really, really grateful that she does the work, and I get to be a part of it. I’m just grateful I get to be a part of the work at all.

I told my therapist yesterday that I just feel like I’m doing the most exciting and interesting work I can imagine, and that I’m using my gifts and skills in the best way I know to help the world. There’s not really much more I could ask for from work. So, yeah, just getting to be a part of it is shockingly humbling.

And it’s interesting the way it all weaves together. The kind of compound interest that forms. From my parents modeling a healthy and loving relationship. To falling in love with Garrett. To receiving in that support that I can do anything. To starting a business. To finding spiritual mentors and teachers. To working with Deana for years on maintaining my energy. To getting my legal protections. To getting my taxes aligned and ready to grow for the future. To working with Sherri. To finding our amazing Sacred Circle and Sacred Mastermind family.

It’s just—incredible. And I know I wouldn’t be doing exactly what I get to do if it weren’t for the love and support around me. If it weren’t for the weekly conversations I get to have with Sherri and Alexis. Or the other close friends in my life—the coaches, healers, and supporters. My own therapist. When I changed over to Garrett’s insurance, my only concern was, “But I get to keep my therapist, right?” I can’t imagine how much the work would change without him.

I’ve always thought support teams were critical. But, in recent years, I’ve come to find that these containers are everything. Because they give us the template, the model, to form new containers. They teach us what we deserve and who we are. They give us the strength and wisdom to take risks.

When you’re that rooted, you can grow even higher. And we need really, really strong roots to grow as high as we’re all planning on growing.

I’m just in this place of extreme gratitude lately. That I get to show up, be myself, and do work that I care about. And it’s because of all of the amazingly strong people who’ve supported me every step of the way. The containers that kept feeding me, even when I tried to refuse receiving. The ones who believed in me even when I couldn’t believe in myself.

Garrett said something to me once—so nonchalantly—but I’ve carried it with me everyday. He said, “Right now, there’s someone desperately looking for everything you are. Even the parts of yourself that you think are wrong or broken.”

And it’s shockingly me that all of myself is exciting what I get to do in work every day.

So my advice for success—whatever that means to you—isn’t to hustle or strive. It’s simply to find at least one person who believes in you that much. And who can help you believe in yourself that much.

Because, with support, anything is possible. You just might change the world.

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